the boy is trained.

I still can't believe this kid is potty trained.

I thought it was going to be a total nightmare.

I really did.

He seemed to have little, to no interest in the toilet at all.

And I had little to no interest in cleaning up his 'accidents'.

So as long as we were both concerned…he would be in diapers until he was 18.

And then he was on his own.

But Ry felt differently.

He doesn't have the luxury of cleaning up people's excrements for a living like I do.

So he begged me to please, please get Carsie out of diapers

I think the last straw was when Ryan was at a buddies house, with Carson, and Carsie took off his dry diaper, and then proceeded to pee on the floor…and the wall.

I reminded Ry that pee is sterile, so it's no big deal.

Ry reminded me that our kid is not a dog, so it is a big deal.

And embarrassing.

So we got down to business.

(no pun intended).

I texted girlfriends, begging for advice on how to do this potty training business with boys.

I read the 'three day' thing.

And that seemed ridiculous.

(only because both Carson and I have a very short attention span…and that seemed like an eternity).

So I decided…the kid gets one day.

One day of him being naked, and us staying home all day, and the potty seat being in the living room.

One day of our entire house being considered a latrine.

That's it.

And by god…the kid figured it out.

He peed on the floor once.

He pooped on the floor once.

He peed in his pants when I got little cocky on day 2 of training and took him out for a long run…after I gave him two sippy cups of milk to keep him entertained (and more importantly…quiet) and then told him to please wait just 30 more seconds while I did a few more things.

Apparently he didn't have 30 more seconds to wait.

Dumb me.

Oh, and there was an incident at Target, that involved poop and pants…but that blame lies solely on his Zaide.  She let him look at the toys too long…in the very back of the store.  And the bathrooms are in the the very front of the store.  

Dumb Zaide.

Other than that…the kid is a full blown bathroom using boy.

Smart Carson.

Carsie, all the money we are going to save in diapers…we are going to use for light fixtures.

So thank you.

And, also, a big thanks to you pal, for making me look like a hero to your urophobic Dad.

He left for a business trip when you were in diapers on a Monday… and he came home on a Thursday to a boy that wouldn't let a diaper touch his precious body.

And I quote:

"No, no Dada.  I don't want ANY baby dipes on my body.  I just want my peeny out, touching my leg, with my pants over it."

Maybe next week I will teach him what exaggeration means.

Oh, and for the record he was rewarded heavily.

A M&M for pee.

A Hot Wheel for poop.

And a high five after hands were washed.