A lump in my throat.

So after eight bags, four of them Hadley's, two nervous breakdowns (with actual tears and silent sobs), and one full prescription of anti-anxiety pills later...we're off to Hawaii. Because I'm always one to be prepared (should have been a girl scout), I wrote Hads a little letter just in case something should happen to us. Here's a snippet of it:

Now, if for some reason I don‘t get to see you grow up, there are a few key things I need to you remember and know, since I can‘t be there to teach it to you. I want you to be anything you want in this world, just don’t be boring. Whatever you do, do it with pizazz. You absolutely light up a room when you enter it, and I don’t want you to lose this gift. You are a girl with a whole lot of spunk, so become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know. You need to listen and mind adults, but sometimes it’s okay to ‘color outside of the lines.’ Always say please and thank-you…always! It will take you far, trust me. Being polite never goes unnoticed. Always ask if you ‘may be excused from the dinner table’, this shows respect to whomever made you that meal. And never forget to send a thank-you card. It’s the simplest gesture that can make someones day and will make them want to keep doing nice things for such a grateful person. Give hugs and kisses hello and goodbye, human touch is such a warm, powerful thing. Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them. Never be afraid to fail, otherwise how could you learn to enjoy success. Avoid negative people. Return all things you borrow. Sing in the shower, even if Zaide tells you your voice stinks. Take responsibility for every area of your life, don’t blame others and don’t ever expect life to be fair. Have a firm handshake. Don’t be afraid to say “I made a mistake” or “I don’t know”, it will keep you real and make other people want to help you. Keep your promises, no matter what. Floss your teeth. Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours. But do approach love and cooking with reckless abandon. Don’t be a girl who is ‘easy’, these girls are not respected and get nothing out of it except a bad reputation…hold out for love and please at least hold out until you’re out of high school. And keep this in mind, every time you have sex, you can get pregnant or you can not get pregnant. That’s 50/50. So don’t fool yourself into thinking that if you only do it once without protection, the odds are in your favor. Look people in the eye. Don’t waste time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and in the end, it’s only with yourself. Enjoy your body, be physically active and use it everyway you can. Go for a bike ride, a hike, a run, go skiing. Just take care of the body you have and don’t be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own. You don’t always get what you want. Be humble. Have close friends, friends that love you for all that you are and keep them close because the older you get the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. Go to college, and don‘t expect anyone else to support you. Embrace change. When someone is upset, has lost a loved, and or needs a good cry sometimes it’s just best to listen. You don’t need to find the perfect words, because there often aren‘t any. Make your bed every morning, it will make you look forward to getting in it at night. Remember to keep your head up (keep your dober up), have a good sense of humor, and never stop smiling. Because really, through all the muck and milestones of life, these are the keys to happiness.

Kiddo, we're going to miss you so much, but know that you're going to have a blast with your G&G's and Auntie. And we'll shower you with loot when we get back to help alleviate our guilt.

PS Whomever gets her walking while we're away gets a box of chocolate covered Macadamia nuts.